WHAT WOMEN LOOK FOR A MAN

Did You Know?

A woman’s pre-programmed genetic desire to find a “good provider” influences many of her choices, even when she least suspects it.

Researchers in Austria have found that even the car a man drives may influence how a woman views a potential mate.

Women were asked to rate pictures of the fronts of cars, just as they would rate photos of men, and to assign the cars personality characteristics (such as “strong,” “weak,” “friendly,” or “powerful”).

Women preferred cars that projected status, dominance, and power, because they assumed the men driving these cars were financially stable, strong, and had the ability to provide for a family.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at help.bookofdistraction@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! xoxo ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

HOW TO DEAL WITH REJECTION

Rejection seems like the biggest nightmare in the world, but this doesn’t mean that life has to stop and you can never try again. You have to get back on the bandwagon and try again. Imagine if you never tried anything in your life because you were worried about getting rejected. How boring life would be! There is a saying: It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.

Getting a kiss rejected is hard, but just like anything in life, you do get over it. You have to try again. Yes, it will be scary, but it has to be done sooner or later - and it might as well be sooner! I know it is a scary thought, but imagine if you never had another kiss for the rest of your life because you were too scared to try again...

Ask yourself why your kiss was rejected. Don’t lie to yourself, either. See the truth objectively. Maybe the other person didn’t like you in that way, or they had a boyfriend, or they thought you were drunk, or they were drunk. There could be many reasons for it, but you have to face the facts so you remember for next time.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT UNREQUITED LOVE?

A Man’s Unrequited Love

Studies show that men not only fall in love faster, they also fall in love more—and many times, the women they fall for don’t love them back!

About 80 to 90 percent of young adults have experienced unrequited love; they loved someone who did not love them in return. It’s a common (and frustrating) experience, and men report it more often than women.

Tell us what you think of unrequited love? Have you experienced it before? How many times and Why?



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at help.bookofdistraction@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! xoxo ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN YOU ARE 20

Perhaps a little rough around the edges, this is the ‘no frills, no fluff’ advice I would give to my 20-year-old self if I ever got the chance to travel back in time.

1. Life is significantly easier when you’re honest with yourself and others.  This doesn’t mean you should be rude and inconsiderate, but it’s better to be upfront when you have to rather than concealing things and letting them fester.

2. Stand up for yourself.  Some people will do anything for their own personal gain at the expense of others – cut in line, take money/property, bully/belittle, pass guilt, etc.  Do not accept this behavior.  Most of these people know they’re doing the wrong thing and will back down surprisingly quickly when confronted.  In a public setting people tend to keep quiet until one person speaks up, so SPEAK UP. 

3. Drama is never worth putting up with.  If someone over age eighteen can’t be a reasonable, reliable adult on a regular basis, avoid this person.


4. The biggest disappointments in life are the result of misplaced expectations.  Tempering unrealistic expectations of how something ‘should be’ will greatly reduce unnecessary frustration.
5. If you can make a reasonable living doing what you love, DO WHAT YOU LOVE.  You may not get rich, but you’ll get to do what you love, and that’s priceless.  Of course, be smart, take the necessary steps, and ease into it.  Don’t quit your day job until doing what you love pays the bills.  In the same regard, don’t incur large debts getting a law degree or an MBA if you really want to be a graphic designer.  Read Quitter.

6. In most corporate professions, there is no greater differentiating factor in income than a college degree.  I agree that it shouldn’t always be this way, but that is the unfortunate reality.  So if you’re planning to work in a corporate atmosphere – regardless of your profession – get your degree.  It’s never too late to start.  Just attending school looks good on your resume; and many companies offer tuition assistance, so it doesn’t have to be that expensive.

7. Understand that at twenty years of age you are at your most energetic and most creative, but your labor is valued very little.  All the more reason to #1) stand up for yourself and look for the highest bidder and #2) get that degree.

8. Buy fewer things.  When you feel the need to splurge, buy knowledge and EXPERIENCES instead.

9. Little things that you want but don’t necessarily need cost money, and they add up.  This is why so many people in my age bracket don’t seem to have a cent to their name: that $90 a month iPhone plan (or whatever it costs), that cable TV, that 65 inch LCD TV, a new car every three years, etc.  Don’t get carried away.  Maintain a simple budget and do some basic accounting each month. 

10. Set up a safety fund.  Yes, I know the savings account interest rates are insanely low right now, but having at least six months of expenses in readily accessible cash can save you a lot of hassle on a rainy day.

11. Loan money to friends and family judiciously.  Nuff said.

12. Your credit score will come in handy some day.  Don’t be careless with it.

13. Everything in moderation.  Don’t be a slave to any substance, especially food.

14. Avoid fatty, sugary foods.  Eat your vegetables.  Stick to a healthy balanced diet.

15. Start exercising yesterday.

16. Staying in shape is simpler than most people make it.  Body fat is dictated by what you eat and your activity.  Working out affects two things mainly: fat and muscle.  Aerobic exercise burns fat and builds a little muscle.  Weight training builds muscle and burns a little fat.  In most cases, if you’re overweight you’re eating too much and/or not exercising enough.  Period.

17. Don’t merely exist… LIVE.  Experience as much as you can.  Do not fall into an endless routine.  Do not become overly comfortable with TV and YouTube as your primary sources of entertainment.  Go places.  Do things.  Try new things.  Follow your curiosities and passions.  Take chances.  Carpe diem.  No one ever achieved anything great through laziness.  Don’t let fear and complacency stop you from a truly rewarding life.  Read The 4-Hour Workweek.

18. Always do what you feel in your heart is right.

19. Love is a choice; it’s not magic.  There is no such thing as ‘the one.  You are not destined for any relationship other than the one you help create.  Spend enough time with another loving person, and biology eventually kicks in.  So use your head and find someone you really enjoy spending time with, who you don’t feel pressured to impress – someone who makes you feel loved, relaxed, and comfortable in your own skin.

20. Invest time and energy in yourself every day.  When you invest in yourself, you can never lose, and over time you will change the trajectory of your life.  You are simply the product of what you know.  The more time and energy you spend acquiring pertinent knowledge, the more control you have over your life.

21.Learn some basic, modern survivability skills – how to change a tire, jumpstart a car, safely bust a car window if you’re stuck, render first aid, etc.

22. Help your fellow neighbor.  The whole “what goes around comes around” concept is the truth.  You may be on top of the world right now – feeling untouchable.  You may have all the tools at your disposal to do and say whatever you want.  But life is a circle that eventually comes back around.  So be polite, be courteous, and at least dream that civilization can be civil.  Either way, it starts with you; because a society is the sum of its parts.

23. You actually die twice in this world.  Once when you stop breathing, and a second time several years later when somebody says your name for the last time.  So do things that matter; leave a legacy.  Time is running out.

24.Try to picture us older folks as the twenty-somethings we used to be.  Talk to us.  We’re still pretty cool, we’ve just learned a thing or two over the years – things you will likely find interesting.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHY WOMEN FALL IN LOVE FASTER THAN MEN DO

Myth #6: Women fall in love faster than men do.

Truth: Research shows that men fall in love first…even if they don’t want to admit it!

When couples are asked, “When did you first fall in love with your partner?” men report falling in love much earlier in the relationship than women do. And, yes, I’m referring to love, not lust or sexual attraction. In my long-term study, responses from men who are dating and men who are married are the same. As hard as this may be for men to admit or believe, when Cupid pulls out his bow and arrow, the arrow hits men first.

Unlike men, women are more selective and cautious about who they love; they are more guarded and express their feelings slowly. Women want to be sure about their partner and the relationship before they fall in love or confess their love. Far from the blushing, swooning starlets who get weak-kneed in the presence of an eligible bachelor in old-fashioned flicks, real women are much more pragmatic and rational than men are, at least when it comes to love.

THINGS TO KNOW ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS AND COMPATIBILITY

Relationships are one of the most popularly discussed and written about topics. Look at the covers of magazines and tabloids, especially women’s magazines. When they put the word “sex” on the cover, sales increase.

I’m not sure who is worse, women or men. Women have sex and then want to read more about it. Men have sex and want to look at pictures when they’re not having it! I suppose some people out there don’t have any sex at all and that must be the worst.

Psychology offers a rich source of information on relationships. Research areas include mate selection, marital success, and dysfunctional relationships. I will be brief in relating the appropriate results of psychological research to your life.

Two helpful approaches regarding relationships are: 1) similarity and 2) complementary.


The theory of similarity states that the more like a person you are, the more likely you are to like each other. In other words, the more similar another person is to you, the more likely you are to choose him or her and to enjoy success in a relationship. Think about the question, “What do we have in common?” Similarity includes such factors as attractiveness, values, wealth, culture, religion, education, and even geography. An example of such a couple would be my friends Edward and Lori. They both are conservative, religious, quiet, reserved, and kind. An analysis of their handwriting reveals that they are both at the middle of the road emotionally, each exhibits a good self-image, and both are stubborn. Both of them have very similar basic dispositions. Based on the similarity theory, their relationship has a higher probability of long-term success.

Using neuro-analysis, you can identify individual personality traits between two people and then predict their compatibility from their writing. The most common example of incompatibility is an extreme extrovert trying to date and relate to an introvert. The extrovert openly expresses her feelings and requests that her partner be emotionally expressive as well. The introvert, a person who rarely expresses feelings, could go weeks without ever saying, “I love you.” Since the extrovert needs to give and receive emotional expression more often than the introvert, conflict arises. Thus, it becomes a case of different emotional outlays giving rise to relationship problems. Once identified and
understood, the conflict can be resolved using various techniques.

Compatibility profiles become much more complicated when all the traits are added together.
The second theory is complementary. One trait of one person complements a strength or weakness of the other one. An example of compatible personality traits is a very sensitive insecure woman that dates a very expressive, talkative, generous man. He constantly reassures her and tells her how much he approves of her. Because she is happy receiving this kind of attention, she works very hard to please him in return. Their two personalities complement each other.

Here is another example that is quite common. A man with a highly sarcastic tendency (sharp pointed t-bar), impulsiveness (hard right hand slant) and a temper (t-bar on the right side of stem) would hurt a woman with a high degree of sensitivity to criticism (large looped d stem) and a low self-image (low t-bar) because she is overly sensitive and he is overly caustic. Although he may feel that he loves her, she will be walking around with her ego bruised most of the time because his expressions of frustration are often mean and caustic. If he would choose a girlfriend with a good self-image, sarcasm, and a lack of sensitivity, she could fight back and not be hurt as easily.

The problem with using these traditional psychological theories is that it is difficult for you to pinpoint which personality traits a prospective lover possesses. You could ask your next date to take a 600 question written personality test, but that method has its drawbacks. Traditional personality tests are impractical for you and me to use. Some are accurate, but they are time consuming, costly, and confusing. What you need is a fast, accurate, simple, and covert method of analyzing each other’s personalities. As you now know, neuro–analysis is that method. Simply look at the handwriting, ask a few questions, and observe. You will get the answers you need.

Although it may seem complicated, it is actually quite simple once you practice. You don’t have to know about all the traits in someone’s personality. You don’t need to be an expert on all types of people. All you need to know is how to recognize the personality traits that you want in a mate. Every time you meet a potential mate, you look at his/her personality traits and compare them to yours. If the next prospect you meet has two personalities, lies pathologically, and is paranoid, you simply ask yourself if those qualities will be compatible with your qualities. In this case, I hope you say no. But, if you have two people living inside of you, believe that the whole world is against you, and enjoy making up lies for the fun of it.... you two probably have a lot in common. I wish you the best of luck and the four of you should be very happy together.

Therefore, just look at the individual traits of someone you are interested in and ask yourself how similar or complementary they are to your own. Yes, it’s that simple. When you doubt how the traits will reveal themselves in the context of your life, analyze your past relationships.

Did any of your ex’s have certain traits that drove you nuts? I know I’ve developed a list of specific traits in other people I call “Hell Traits!” I’ll share them with you later in the book. Your list may be completely different. So get out those old love letters and analyze those past mistakes for a roadway to a better tomorrow!

Know Thyself
The first step to using neuro-analysis effectively in relationships is to take an objective look at yourself. Are you insecure, oversensitive, or afraid of being rejected? You need to know these things about yourself. If you are oversensitive and introverted, you do not want to get involved with an
extroverted, sarcastic, hate-filled person. Your ego would be crushed. The easiest way to take inventory of your true personality is to analyze your own handwriting. Simply look at your own handwriting and compare it with the traits found in this book. You can also use the information found in the trait dictionary or a Grapho-Deck, if you have one. Discover those traits about yourself that a partner would find attractive or repulsive. Check out the trait dictionary and compare the results for a reality check. Before looking at your own writing, how would you describe yourself? You will take an inventory of your own perceptions in a moment.

Be honest.
Are you stubborn or domineering? Do you have to have it your way? Are you a loner? Do you prefer to sit in your room and read than be around people? Are you emotionally withdrawn, sarcastic, vindictive, or mean? Are you generous, good at keeping secrets, friendly, enjoy people, or optimistic? Are you ambitious or confident? Most people’s perceptions of themselves vary slightly with reality. Handwriting has always been a good reality check for me. I can’t tell you how many times I have looked down at my own handwriting only to cover it up and hope no one was watching!

To make your personality list easy and painless, I have designed a Personality Inventory in which you can just fill in the blanks. This checklist is designed to outline what you think your personality is like
and what you want in a relationship. The instructions are very simple. Check any box you feel applies to you or your ideal mate. Check both boxes if it seems right to you. Be sure to include both positive and negative traits. This will give you an inventory of where your strengths and weaknesses lie. After you have completed the Personality Inventory, make a written list of your most prevalent traits and the traits you want in a mate, as you chose in the inventory. Keep this list handy so you will know what to look for when you start looking at handwriting samples of prospective lovers.

When developing a profile of your ideal mate, attempt to structure the list in individual traits, opposed to generalities of behavior. Some men would like to say, “Uh, subservient, good cook, keeps her mouth shut, good in bed, and serves me and the boys beer during the football game!” (No, we
won’t have any of those vast chauvinistic generalizations!) Instead, break those desires into traits. It is perfectly okay to want a mate that can keep a house organized and clean. In that case look for organizational ability and perfectionism. Be aware that you may be giving up the ability to throw your jeans across the chair when you get home! No matter what you want in an ideal mate, you are the real issue in this game. The person you attract will only be a reflection of who you are. If you are a loser, you will attract losers. If you are an interesting, sincere, and neat person, once you begin to use neuro-analysis effectively, you will attract more good people like yourself.

Take a look at your own personality and decide what type of person best suits your needs. Be objective. You also may need something completely different than you think you want. If you are a weak, domineering, manipulative, violent scumbag that hits women... you need a woman with
a low self-image (low t-bar) and a desire to be punished (pointed backward t-bar). That way, your psychotic criminal behavior complements her insecure, self-castigating weaknesses. (Sick, but true.)
Hopefully, that example doesn’t apply to you. Take a good look at yourself before you start looking at others. You might want a strong person because you are passive. You might want someone equally as strong as you. Make this distinction when filling out the Personality Inventory. You may not know what you want. Understanding what you need is a process. It takes practice, learning, and fine-tuning. Use your imagination and best judgment. Remember, you can always change your mind.

Much of this book is dedicated to understanding people so you can avoid bad apples and recognize diamonds. However, I strongly believe that you will (and always have) attract to you those people that match your needs on some level or another. Therefore, if you are not completely satisfied at
the moment, you need to evaluate carefully all your needs. So, get a writing utensil. Find a place with few distractions. Complete the Personality Inventory on the following pages. The box marked “ Me” is your own traits, “Mate” is for what you want in a mate.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

FIFTH RELATIONSHIP MYTH TO A HEALTHY NEW LIFE

Myth #5: Women are more romantic than men.

Truth: Studies show that it’s actually men—not women—who have more romanticized beliefs about love and relationships.

This myth is always shocking to both men and women. Research reveals that men, hands down, hold more idealized views of love and relationships.

Consider these statements. Do you think they’re true?

THE DOs AND DON'Ts OF TEXTING IN RELATIONSHIPS

The modern world has seen a drastic change in the way we communicate with each other in our day to day lives. The more I think about it there more I wonder why people still send letters and birthday cards. What’s the point? Just send a nice text..

When it comes to relationships more and more couples are becoming very reliant on their mobile phones for communication and this is risky business. I am 100% happy that we are so privileged to have such amazing technology at our hands; I owe a lot to it. But in the wrong hands, texting can certainly ruin relationships. Texting can be a great way to keep things alive in a relationship and
really get your partner wanting more of you. Not to mention how good texting is for when you’re not actually with anyone yet and you want to be. Texting takes the pressure off actual phone calls and gives you time to think about your responses carefully. But don’t be fooled, texting is a serious safety hazard in a relationship.

Right, the main problem with texting is that it can really bring out your insecurities, or your partner’s. Simple texting mistakes can get either of you all worried and wondering what the hell is going on, even if the text was suppose to be nice:


1. Don’t get into the habit 

I’ve put this one first because I genuinely think it’s the most important thing any new couple should know about texting: DON’T GET INTO THE HABIT!!!

If you find yourselves texting back and forth a lot, near enough all day every day. Then you need to stop right now. Talk to each other about this, but don’t let it carry on any longer. As I’ve already said one text can ruin a relationship, so if you’re texting constantly then that one text could crop up a few too many times. Things like sarcasm and playful banter through texts can often be misunderstood
and this could cause huge arguments and genuinely upset one of you. I’m not saying don’t use texts to be playful, just be extremely careful when you do.

The other side to getting into the habit of texting is getting used to it. You’re going to get used to texting each other all the time. All day every day, knowing that every time you send a text, you’ll get a reply. It’s a nice feeling, and that’s why so many new couples fall into the trap. Knowing that where ever you are and whatever you’re doing you can just send a text and have a chat. Lovely. But wait,
why haven’t they text me back? What are they doing? Why aren’t they replying they always reply?! It’s been over half an hour and I’ve still not had a text, where are they? Who are they with?
Do you see what I mean?

OK obviously this isn’t going to happen to everyone. But when we get used to something for a long period of time our brains and bodies learn to expect it. Then if it is suddenly taken away from us this creates conflict throughout our brains and bodies and we can often react very strongly to it because
our minds are trying to put things right. This can lead to intense feelings of paranoia and jealousy, which as you can imagine, can lead to a rough road. The more this happens the more the feelings of paranoia and jealousy take over our thoughts and so we will find ourselves becoming a more paranoid and jealous person in general, and especially towards out partner. Remember, we become what we think. So if you’re starting to think jealous and paranoid thoughts every time you don’t get an instant reply from your partner, it’s going to start making its way into your subconscious. Don’t fall into the trap! This also affects you form the other end of the stick. If you’re always texting and then all of a sudden you’re really busy with something, or you’re having a heart to heart chat with your best friend, you’re going to feel like you should still be texting your partner. This can be really unproductive if you’re busy with something important, or it can be extremely rude if your friend is spilling their heart out to you and you’re sat looking at your phone. This leads on to a point I’d like
to make about technology in general.

I think it’s quite unfortunate that phones seem to be taking over people’s lives. They will sit on a bus or train and play on their phones instead of watching the world around them. I think this is such a shame because we live in such a beautiful, unpredictable world and people are missing everything that happens right in front of them. But, having said this I’m willing to accept that it is what it is and that’s the way people change. However, I’m not going to sit down and watch technology take over relationships and ruin thousands of potentially happy couples.

I want to get this message out there so it doesn’t happen!! Don’t get into the habit!

2. Don’t make assumptions

 Now that I’ve got the texting habit thing off my chest, we can go a little more into certain aspects of
texting that can actually cause arguments. When I say “don’t make assumptions” I’m talking about when you get a text from your next partner and you don’t have a clue what they’re talking about. If this happens to you just reply with something like “I don’t know what you mean? Let’s talk later” or “l8er” if that’s how you text. This way you can just wait until you’re face to face and find out
what they meant, it’s not always easy to explain things over text. If you start to try and work out what they meant you could find yourself walking down a very windy path. You’ll start to wonder if they are in a mood with you, or if they were texting someone else and accidentally sent it to you. It’s just
not worth it, find out later face to face.

3. Don’t overdo the flirting 

Text flirting is great and it can really brighten up your partner’s day. Sending a random text that’s a bit saucy, or paying them a cheesy compliment on the odd occasion can really spice things up. But leave it at that. If you’re constantly texting flirty and romantic messages, things are going to get a bit boring and fast. If you’re going about your day to day business and every message you’re receiving from your partner is either saucy or romantic, you’re going to feel a little embarrassed and it’s going to get uncomfortable. So just keep it to a minimum and use it to your advantage. If you’re staying in together that night or going out for a romantic meal, send a text during the day saying how much you’re looking forward to it and then leave it at that. It’s a great way to get the excitement bubbling in your partner, let alone remind them in case they forgot!

4. Don’t overdo the banter 

Banter over text is great, and you can really have some fun with it. You might find that with your old
friends you can have some serious banter going over text and it’s nothing but hilarious. Well in relationships this can be a little bit different, especially new relationships. If you’re still getting to know each other then you’re not always going to know how to take the things that you say to each other. When you’re face to face, you can get away with saying something a bit playful and teasing
your partner because they can tell from your body language, and usually the big grin on your face that you’re joking. Well, say goodbye to all that over texting. All you’ve got to work with are words, so press carefully with that thumb. You want to keep it as light as you possibly can, and not too frequent. If you keep it as un-personal as you can then it’s clearly a joke and you lower the risk of them thinking you are being serious. There’s nothing worse than thinking you’ve just sent a
hilarious text to find out it just made your partner cry. So be careful.

5. Don’t text if you’re angry

This goes back to the part of the book that mentions not saying things in the heat of the moment. Well, when you’re texting you have no excuse. Face to face in the heat of the moment it’s easy to
let your emotions get the better of you and for you to say things that you don’t really mean. Well when you’re texting, you’ve got the option to just not press send. It’s that simple. Text arguments are a big no no and they are so very easily avoided. If there’s something the two of you need to talk about
then you are going to have to wait until you’re face to face or at least on a phone call.

Leave the arguments for better forms of communication. You’ll only regret it when you’re arguing and trying to text really quickly to get your point across, then you make stupid mistakes and it seems like you said something that you didn’t actually mean and now you have to start explaining that
before you can explain what caused the argument in the first place……get my point?

It can be very hard to just leave something for later when you care so much about it, but in the long run it’s the best thing for your relationship and that’s what you should really care about.


6. Don’t tell them any bad news

If you’ve got bad news then just wait until you can tell them properly .Sending a text to someone
with bad news is like holding a mouse just out of a cats reach so it can’t quite get hold of it. You’re just going to make your partner worry for the whole day until they can find out the details and that’s just not fair. This includes if the bad news is that you want to break up with them. It should go without saying, don’t break up over text.

7. Do text random nice messages

 Life can get very busy, and sometimes you’re not going to have time to send a long message or
have a text chat. So sending a quick message could make a big difference to their day.
Even if it’s simply asking them how their day is, or telling them you hope they’re having a
good day. This kind of little thing goes a long way in relationships and if it’s not done too often it will be sure to make your partner feel great. So when you’re on your busy days and you can’t spend time chatting, surprise them with a nice text and see how much happier they are with you when you see them.

8. Do text if you’re far away

Studies have shown that texting can create a strong sense of connection between two people, more so
than other similar forms of communication like email. If you’re working away, or you’re in a long distance relationship then texting could keep things alive. The last thing you want is your partner forgetting about you because you’re so far away.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHAT WOMEN DO WITH SELF DISCLOSURE

An Inside Look at Self-Disclosure

What else does research reveal about self-disclosure? Here are some interesting findings to think about:

• Women typically disclose more than men. Some men find it difficult to reveal information about themselves and their relationships. If you are a woman dating a man, don’t expect your date to
tell you quite as much as you may be telling him. If you are a man dating a woman, don’t be surprised when she presses you for more information than you care to reveal.

WHAT WILL YOU DO IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT

Well there’s been some pretty solid advice in here to help you on your way to having an amazing relationship, whether you’re looking to find one or you’re in a new one I hope you can use some of the tips and techniques in here to make it last long and stay fun. If you’ve read this book and you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, I hope there have been things that you can also take away
to make your relationship better. But no book in the world is going to absolutely guarantee that you can start a relationship and make it turn into a happy one. The fact of the matter is; some people just aren’t compatible. You can try your best to ignore floors in people but when you get close to
them and see it a lot, sometimes it’s just too much to handle and that’s just the way it is. I personally believe that the sooner you realise these things the better. You don’t want to wait as long as you can, to keep trying to make things work and then find out that you really just can’t. Breaking up with someone is one of the hardest things to do, and the longer you leave it the harder it will get. You
have to listen to your feelings here, really let your mind and body tell you what it thinks about being with this person. Ideally your mind and body will at first feel nothing but excitement and happiness when you think about and see your new partner, but that’s not always going to be the case.


Sometimes you’re just not ready for a relationship, or it’s just not the right person for you. This is going to happen occasionally if you have a lot of relationships. It might be that the first time you enter a relationship it turns out to be the only relationship you will ever have, but for most people there’s a few bumpy roads along the way before finding that special someone to have that special relationship with So, how do you actually break up with someone? Well like I say, it’s better to find
out that you don’t want to be with someone early. This way, the break up isn’t going to be as painful for either of you. Of course it’s not going to be all smooth sailing either but its far better in the long run that it’s early before even stronger emotions are formed. The key is not to be critical of your partner, because this is going to affect them forever in some way or another. You don’t want to send them off thinking that they’ll never find a good relationship because eventually everyone will
see the things you saw and will want to break up with them. Whatever your problem with them was, it was your problem. Someone else somewhere might find that to be a really attractive quality and it’s not fair if you put it in their head that no one else will ever like these things about them. You have to be completely non-judgemental about things.

Just accept that they are the way they are and you just didn’t happen to like that in a partner and so you are moving on. You do have to be careful about what you say when breaking up with someone, but if you’re mature enough about the situation then it doesn’t really matter too much about what you say because it will be coming from the right place. If you have made your mind up and you know that you don’t want to be in a relationship with that person, then there’s little that can change that. So staying strong and breaking the news gently will usually be enough to end things without it getting ugly. Everyone reacts differently to this sort of thing but what matters is how you react, and you basically have to be strong and logical about the situation. Try not to let your emotions get involved, just realise that there is no way the relationship is going to turn into a happy future so it’s best that you go your separate ways.

If it happens that your partner is the one who wants to break it off, you have two choices. You can choose to fight for your relationship and convince them that you should stay together and work things out, or you can accept their decision and move on. Now it’s hard for me to advise you on this without knowing what the situation is. But I would say this is something you should think about carefully, because I genuinely believe that life’s too short to be trying to win someone back who doesn’t want you. Especially when there could be someone right under your nose that just hasn’t had the opportunity to show you how they feel. But I also wouldn’t want to discourage you from fighting
for love, because like many songs have said; it’s worth fighting for.


“You have to be willing to give up what you’ve got to get what you want, if it’s not working for you now then what makes you think it will ever work.”


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

DATING TIPS THAT EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW

Airplane Syndrome: Your Pre-Date Safety Check

Picture yourself boarding a plane. You’re taking a vacation you’ve been looking forward to for ages, and in just two short hours, you’ll arrive at your destination.

You settle into your seat and buckle up, take a deep breath, and relax.

Just as you are about to reach for your headphones, your seatmate turns to you and starts to tell you her entire life story:

How she had to put in extra time at work to make this trip.

HOW NOT TO BE AN UNFAITHFUL

Well I’m not here to tell you what you can and can’t do, I’ve simply been giving my advice
on what I think will send you on your way to entering a great relationship. So I wanted to include a bit of advice about being unfaithful. I’ve already touched on this a few times so you will know by now that in no way do I ever think it’s acceptable, because it’s simply not going to lead to a good relationship… whether you get found out or not.

I just want to go through a few things with you on the topic of being unfaithful in hope that it will make you think a bit more deeply into things.

Let’s look at some potential reasons why people might be unfaithful in a relationship:


They’re unhappy
They’re bored
They like the excitement
They think their partner might be cheating on them
They’re not getting enough action

They’re unhappy: If this is the case, then it’s quite obvious what I’m going to say now. You only have one shot at this life you’re living so why would you spend even one moment of it in a relationship that makes you unhappy? Also, if this is the case as you’re entering a new relationship then get out now. You have no excuse. If you’re not happy as the relationship is in its early stages then there’s not much chance you’ll be happy further down the line. A relationship needs to be built on solid foundations and you being unhappy and unfaithful is a recipe for disaster.

They’re bored: The same goes. If you’re bored then get out of the relationship. If you’re cheating because you’re bored then why not just be single and have fun, without hurting anyone?
They like the Excitement: If you’re someone that likes the thrill of having an affair and feeling the risk of getting caught, then you need to decide whether it’s worth holding that over your head. If you can live with the thought that at any moment your partner could find out about what you’re doing and it could crush their whole world, then there’s no advice I could give to you here in this book. That could take a few therapy sessions before we decided whether you are going to stop or not. You should be able to get your excitement from within your relationship, and if you’re not getting that then it’s time you had a think about whether the relationship is worth holding on to.

They think their partner might be cheating on them: Ok this is going to get a little complex.
Thinking that your partner could be cheating on you can either be because you are seeing genuine signs that point you to this conclusion, or you are getting too insecure and paranoid. Either way, cheating on them isn’t going to make anything better. Let me explain this to those of you who might
not quite understand why this would be a reason to cheat on someone. It’s quite common that someone who believes their partner is cheating on them will cheat themselves.

There is usually one of two reasons for this. Firstly the person will think along the lines of, well if they’re cheating on me then I’m going to cheat on them so I don’t look like a fool. If this is you, then I would strongly suggest you read this carefully. If you decide to do this when entering a relationship,
you could be in with a nasty shock one day. Say you end up staying together for a long time, and you fall deeply in love with this person. Then one day you find out that indeed you were right, they had cheated on you. I’m afraid the chances of you feeling better because you cheated on them too are
next to nothing. You are still going to feel just as hurt and betrayed, but you can add a guilty conscience to this too. You might decide that you want to break up because of what you found out, but this could prove difficult because you will almost feel like you want to forgive them because you did it too. This is going to stress you out a lot and you’re going to go through a very rough patch in your life. However, at least if you were faithful all the way down the line you can take the guilty conscience out of the equation. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but at least you have your pride. Also, of course, there is the chance that further down the line your partner will find out that you
cheated on them and they could leave you.

Your whole world ripped from beneath your feet for some stupid mistake you made years ago. Do you want to risk that just because you think your partner might be cheating on you? The other reason for someone cheating because they think their partner is cheating on them is actually slightly backwards. It is usually found that if someone is cheating they will start to think that their partner is
cheating too and will just do it more. This can be in the form of projection, which is when we are in denial of our own faults and so project them onto others as a form of defence for ourselves. So when someone is cheating they will start accusing their partner of cheating because they are in denial of
doing it themselves. Another reason for cheating leading to a person believing their partner must be cheating is because they often think “well if I’m getting away with it, then how do I know they aren’t?” This is a viscous cycle, and I would suggest to you that if you believe your partner to be cheating on you so much that you would go out and cheat on them for any reason, then you need to
question whether you should even be in that relationship.

They’re not getting enough action: What happens in the bedroom in a relationship is important, there’s no two ways about it. But it’s not excuse to be unfaithful. If you are unsatisfied with the amount of ‘bedroom’ time you’re getting in your relationship then it’s once again that time to think about whether you should be in that relationship at all. Talk to your partner, don’t just go running off
with the first person to pay you any attention. You might find that there is a reason for the lack of action in the relationship, and that it can be easily resolved. Open and honest, remember?


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

THE FOURTH RELATIONSHIP MYTH TO A HEALTHY NEW LIFE

Myth #4: When dating, it’s best to “get it all out there” as soon as possible.

Truth: It’s better to reveal personal information about yourself gradually over time. If the person is right for you, there will be plenty of time for the details to unfold.

Now that you’re dating (or at least thinking about dating), you may worry about repeating some of the same mistakes you made in your past relationship. You may believe that it’s now your job to lay it all on the table, the good and the bad, so your potential partner knows exactly what he or she is getting into and what you’re all about. Besides, getting everything out in the open will be a quick way to find out if this person is right for you, so you won’t waste your time either, right?

The problem that most people do are disclosing too much information on the first date. If you tell all early on—especially intimate and personal information—your date is likely to feel overwhelmed, or worse, he or she may think you tell your life story to everyone. Studies show that people do not want to hear too much, too soon. It’s called the “airplane syndrome”—when someone divulges excessive amounts of personal information to a relative stranger. Research has found that these people, who think they’re just being honest and open, are viewed by the listener as not trustworthy, because they tell all without knowing the other person first.

WHAT IS A FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS

What about “Friends with Benefits”?

What if you and your friend are more than friends—complete with sleepovers, intimate encounters, or sex—but aren’t necessarily in an actual relationship?

Researchers have explored this type of relationship, and many report that these friendships can work, but they are very complicated; clear expectations and communication are needed.

More often than not, sex among friends is problematic.

Since the “rules” or expectations of a friendship are different from the rules for romantic or sexual relationships (friendships come with fewer obligations, are not as emotionally intense, and are not exclusive), it can be confusing and challenging when lines are crossed or blurred.

In addition, it’s challenging for both friends to be on the exact same page at the exact same time when it comes to sex, and whether they want more from the friendship.



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at help.bookofdistraction@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! xoxo ;) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHAT IS FLIRTING

Flirting… Right now this is a tough one. Flirting can mean all kinds of things, and some people will consider things to be flirting that others wouldn’t. This is another thing that really depends on the individual. As long as you know what you’re comfortable with, then you should be able to sort this out before any arguments come along. There are all sorts of different kinds of flirting; flirting
to get your own way, flirting to get some attention, flirting because you fancy someone.

First of all let’s think about what you’re going to allow yourself to do in terms of flirting now that you’re entering a committed relationship. You might believe that a bit of harmless flirting is fine as long as there are no intentions behind it, you might think flirting to get something like a free drink at a bar is fine. It’s entirely up to you but you should have a think about what you think is acceptable
for you to do. That way, if your new partner doesn’t like it, you have the choice whether to stick to your values and tell them if you can’t accept that this is how I am without getting insecure then this isn’t going to work or you can change your ways to suite your partner…your call.


Now let’s look at what you’re going to accept as okay for how your partner flirts with other people. This will often come down to how secure you are in yourself, but remember if you think it’s ok to do something, but you don’t think it’s ok when your partner does it, you need to re-think your values. If
you can work out how far or how much flirting would be acceptable for your partner to do, then you can express this to them before it actually happens and they can decide whether they accept this as fair or not. If they do, then there will be no problems as they will know their boundaries, but if they don’t accept it then this is where they will have the choice to change or to stick to how they are and put the relationship at risk. Getting these things out in the open early on in the relationship means that there are more opportunities to go your separate ways quickly, but in the long run this is far better than staying with someone who you’re not going to get along with.

You will come across all kinds of boundaries that you may not have even realised you had before you entered this new relationship. But the important thing to take away is that you should be open and honest about them as soon as you can.

In the Bedroom: Right, the juicy stuff! Personally, I don’t think forcing this into conversation
is a particularly good idea as it might get awkward and weird. If you’re sat eating a meal in a restaurant and your partner comes out with “so how rough do you like it in the sack” you’re probably going to end up spitting your food all over them. But, that depends on you as a couple because
some people are very comfortable talking about things like that and can make it fun. My suggested way would be to be vocal in the bedroom as things are happening whilst the relationship is still new. This way when things get uncomfortable for you, you can just say and your partner will start to learn
what you like and dislike. Same goes for you and finding out what makes them tick and what turns them off. Just tell them beforehand that you think it would be good if we tested to see what things each other likes in the bedroom and how far things can go. That way they will understand and hopefully be vocal about what they like and dislike too, meaning you will both be able to please each
other like crazy in no time!

If you or your partner drink alcohol, I’d like to give a warning here that this can change things in the bedroom as far as boundaries are concerned. Alcohol lowers your inhibitions so you or your partner might be ok with something whilst under the influence of alcohol but not when sober. So just remember if you did something with your partner that was a bit out there and they were drunk, they
might not like it the next time your try it. You have to bear these things in mind and always be looking to learn about your new partner, and that’s not just in the bedroom.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHAT TO DO WHEN SAME SEX FRIENDSHIPS ARE NOT ENOUGH

Even though men and women can be friends, this doesn’t mean that everyone desires or is happy being “just friends.”

Opposite-sex friendships certainly have their challenges—keeping romance out of the friendship, dealing with friends who want to see the two of you “together” (and who may hassle you about it), and trying to figure out if you and your friend have the same expectations about your friendship.

For some people, no matter how hard they try, platonic friendships with the opposite sex just don’t work. And although research shows that men have a more difficult time keeping romance out of a friendship—or fantasizing about the possibility of a sexual liaison—women are just as likely to report that attraction makes cross-gender friendships difficult.

The bottom line? Opposite-sex friendships are higher-maintenance than same-sex friendships, but they can also be very rewarding. By simply shifting your beliefs, you won’t miss out on great friendships, and you’ll have a great support system in place as you start dating. As long as you communicate and keep your boundaries, you can be “just friends.”





If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at help.bookofdistraction@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! xoxo ;) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

THE DOs AND DON'Ts OF RELATIONSHIP

1. DON’T give in to your urges all the time

When you’re in a new relationship, it can kind of take over your life. You don’t stop thinking about them all the time, and you have those butterflies in your stomach whenever something reminds you of them.

This is great, and a good sign that things are going well for you. It’s a little bit like where you were a kid at Christmas and you got that one toy that was so much better than all your other presents.
You just wanted to play with that toy and that toy only, forgetting you even had any other presents…especially that jumper that was 2 sizes too big that your grandma got you! Well do you also remember how quickly you got bored of that toy because you didn’t play with anything else? Well it’s time to grow up.

You need to pace your relationship as best you can. You might want to see your new partner every minute of the day, and chances are they feel the same. But you can’t do this because it will ruin the fun, excitement and mystery. Those early days when you’re still learning new things about each other won’t last forever, but if they’re over to quickly then things could become stale fast. As bad as it sounds, you don’t want to give too much away too quickly. Now I am all for being 100% honest and open in a relationship, I would advise no other way. But in those very early stages I do believe that keeping some of yourself locked away for later isn’t always a bad idea.


Mystery is attractive, exciting and key to building that passion and desire that a relationship needs. If you ever hear a new partner say something along the lines of “you’re just so mysterious” then you’re doing it right!

2. DO keep spending time with your friends 

 I don’t want to dwell on this because there are so many relationship books that talk for hours about how important it is to spend time with your friends. Yeah, great…but what about when I’m with my partner? What do I do then? The reason it’s important is firstly because like in number 1, you can’t see each other all the time. But secondly it’s because your friends are just as important, and they’ll be the ones who are there for you if things don’t work out…so show them some respect. Time with your friends keeps you social, and keeps your self confidence up. Assuming you have good friends, they’ll give you confidence in all aspects of your life, including romance and therefore improve your
relationship. You also want to make sure your relationship with your friends is good, because there will come a time when they are going to meet your new partner and you want them to be willing to make an effort with your partner. This will make your partner feel more comfortable around your
friends and this will ease any tension that had a potential to arise.

You’ll also want to make sure that when the time comes, you make a lot of effort to be polite and friendly towards your partner’s friends and family. The amount of uncomfortable situations that can come of their friends or family not liking you is unlimited… so be nice!

3. DO make time for me 

Ok so we’ve discussed not seeing each other all the time and making sure you spend time with your
friends, and now I’m telling you to spend time alone too? So do you get to spend ANY time with your new partner?? Well of course, I’m just getting these out of the way now because they are often overlooked. Me time is something that isn’t always talked much about in relationship advice books,
and I believe that this is asking for disaster. You personal time is so important. It’s just as important as time with your new partner and time with your friends. Now some readers might be thinking “well I don’t like being on my own.” This is time to change that. You need to be able to enjoy your own company for others to enjoy it! Time on your own can be when you really find out who you are. I’m
not just talking about spending time at home on your own watching films as to be honest I think that’s much more enjoyable when you’re with a partner or with friends. I’m talking about self improvement and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.

You could spend your time alone watching TV and sitting in bed, if you choose to and you genuinely enjoy doing that on your own. But I’ve found that when it comes to improving relationships, if a person spends their alone time improving themselves in different areas then they will become a much more loveable and happy person in their relationship.

Ways to improve yourself are endless. If you are studying for anything, then study it and learn all you can about that topic. If you aren’t currently studying for anything then find something you’ve always been interested in and study it.

If you have a hobby that you love, or that you used to love then bring it back into your life and spend time doing it. Improve the skills you already have or learn new skills. Improving yourself and growing as a person improves every area of your life. “Important Lessons for True Happiness: Live
Your Life” gives you activities to do every week to reach your goals and become the person you want to be.

4. Don’t have arguments over text message

This is so important in the modern world. Read further post.

5. Do be yourself

What I mean by this is do stay the way you are as a person. I believe everyone should have strong values and morals, and these can’t change just because you’ve entered a new relationship. If you
don’t have any particular morals and values already, then I strongly suggest you take some time to yourself and work out what you find important in life. Values are the things that you see as the
most important to you. It varies in everyone. Some people value material possessions very highly whereas other people might not see them as being as important as other things.

It doesn’t matter what your values are, it just matters that you know what they are. You need to have a passion, a drive to keep and get all things that align with your values in your life. If you value your family, you need to make sure you are close to them. If you value money, you need to make sure you’re working hard and getting the money that you want. When you’re passionate about your
values you become passionate about getting the things that you want out of life. You get drive, you’ll work hard for things and not only will this improve your life but it will make you a much more attractive person to others and you your relationships will kick off to a great start.

One good way to define your values is to set some goals. There are hundreds of goal setting
techniques out there that are all extremely intelligent so here are my top tips for setting goals that will help you develop a strong drive and maximise your chances of achieving them:

#1 Physically write your goals down, and put them where you can see them

The act of physically writing your goals down does a lot inside of your brain subconsciously that can trigger action a lot quicker than just keeping them inside your head. It re-affirms them and then having them where you can see them means they will be on your mind a lot of the time. Remember; we become what we think.

#2 Get yourself emotionally involved when you write your goals out

For every goal, you need to think why you want it. What has made you decide that this is something you want? If it’s just a small goal, like passing a test, why do you want it? Will it help you in the long run? Will it make people proud? Think about whether achieving this goal would affect other people. If passing a test would make someone close to you proud then that can only add to your
motivation to achieve that goal. If your goal is un-selfish, and you’re just trying to help someone else out then think why you want to help them. What does that person mean to you? What would it mean to them if you achieve this? You really have to get inside of your body and feel that emotion. It will create a huge sense of passion inside you to reach your goals.

#3 Set 3 types of goals: Short Term, Mid Term and Long Term

Your short term goals are things you can do within around 3 months. So things like wanting to be able to run 10 Kilometres by the end the next month, or getting full marks on a test coming up. If you actually make a conscious effort to think about these goals you are so much more likely to not only achieve them but do more than you wanted. Going through life just doing things as they come
around is lazy, and you won’t reach your maximum potential.

Your mid-term goals are things that are going to take a bit longer to achieve. Only you can set the limits on how long you will take to do something, but some things do take more time than others. Mid-term goals are also slightly more permanent or long stretching that short-term. For instance you might want to go travelling. This could mean saving up, then travelling for however long you
choose etc. These goals will probably excite you a bit more than your short term goals, and you should use that excitement to boost your passion towards the goals. (Don’t worry, this does relate to entering a new relationship)

Your long-term goals are your life long dreams. You could say they are a mix between your bucket list and what you want to end up with in life. You should have a view of what you want out of life in the long run, and what you want to end up with. The idea is that your short-term goals and your midterm goals will generally be connected to you long-term goals. They may not do, some goals can be purely for personal satisfaction and won’t have anything to do with the longterm of your life. But usually people are driven by the end goal that is in the back of their mind. You should always be striving to achieve your goals, whether they’re big or small.

#4 Write them again as if you’ve achieved them

Now that you’ve written your goals out, you need to re-write them again. But when you re-write them, change them to being in the perspective that you have actually achieved them. So for example; “I want to get that expensive care before I’m 30” will be changed into “I have the expensive car I always wanted.” Although, be specific of course in your own goals. Be as specific as you can actually, but try to keep your goals to one sentence.

I have a co-authored with Jag Chohan called “Successful Goal Setting: Guarantee Yourself
Success.” I strongly recommend looking at this if you have never set yourself goals before,
or you simply want to achieve more in life.

Ok so where does this fit in to entering a new relationship. Well, it actually ties a lot of the dos and don’ts up. If you have your goals set and you’re passionate about them, then you will have your values. You will be a more routed person so you won’t change yourself.

You will be far more attractive (usually) to others because going for what you want in life is actually quite uncommon as most people unconsciously fear achieving success. And finally, these goals will start to take fruit with-in a relationship and will help the relationship to move forward and become stronger. If the goals end up getting in the way of the relationship, well then that’s a decision you need to make. Remember what we said about values? You need to know what’s more important to you, your personal goals or your relationship.

A side note for males: Studies have found that part of the excitement for women in new relationships is trying to get their man to be how they want them to be in certain ways. They love the challenge of changing a guy and it excites them. Now, are you just going to give in and let all the excitement
slip out of the window? Or are you going to carry on being yourself and let your girl keep trying?

Now morals are different to values, and you will usually have developed these as you grew up and believe it or not they are quite hard to change. As far as relationships are concerned, morals include your views on lying, cheating and manipulating. If you don’t think these things are morally right and you would be hurt if someone did this to you, then don’t be a hypocrite and makes sure you play by the same rules. This also applies if you do think it’s ok to do these things, don’t expect anyone to feel sorry for you if it ends up happening to you too. So I’d say before you carry on, it’s time to make sure you’ve got your values and morals in place, wouldn’t you? And remember “People aren’t unsuccessful because they aim too high and miss, it’s because they aim too low and hit.”


6. Don’t talk about your ex

Ok if you’re mature then you will accept that it is almost impossible not to compare a new partner to an old one, especially if there hasn’t been much time between the 2 (not recommended!!). Thoughts will often creep up on us about how our new partner does something differently to our old partner, and this is completely normal and I’m sure your new partner does this too. But it’s how you see these
thoughts, and whether you actually say them out loud that makes a difference.

Now a quick step back to the first “date” for anyone who is completely new to “dating.” You should absolutely 100% NOT talk about your ex partner on your first date. Nope, shh, stop….don’t do it! You are there to get to know each other, not someone you’re not even with anymore. If you want to talk about your ex so much that you can’t help it, then I don’t think you’re quite ready to be dating
just yet. Some would argue that if the topic was to come up, or even if the person on the date was to ask you about your ex that this means it’s ok to talk about them. Well personally, I would say….NO! Just don’t do it. Change the subject, make a joke out of it and say “I’m not here to talk about my ex, I want to talk about you.” Let’s face it, if the conversation is getting so desperate that your date asks you about your ex, it’s probably not going to work out. OK back to entering a new relationship. Talking about your ex all the time is probably going to make your new partner insecure.

Imagine if they were saying how often they used to go to this place together, or how much they loved it when their ex did this. You’re not going to want to go where ever that was and you’re not going to want to do whatever it was they did. So when you can, just don’t talk about it. This is where I would
differ from the date situation though. Sometimes people have their own insecurities and when it’s your partner it’s your duty to help them feel more secure if the opportunity comes along. Sometimes these insecurities will present themselves in the form of asking questions about your ex’s. This is often because they feel like maybe they’re not good enough compared to your ex, or that you don’t love/like them as much as you did your ex. Well it’s important here that you do talk about your ex, but in the right way. You need to be considerate of your new partner. In no way should you lie, at all. But if you are fully over your ex partner then you should be able to talk about them and play things down without feeling bad about it. And remember, you most certainly should be fully over your
ex partner if you’re entering a new relationship. If your new partner asks about something you and your ex used to do and it just so happens that yes you did absolutely love doing that together, it doesn’t mean you have to tell them that. Just play it down, casually say “yeah it was fun; that was a long time ago” or something along those lines.

Don’t get too attached to the conversation because let’s face it, you shouldn’t be.

7. Do let them know your boundaries

Let me get this out in the open straight away, this includes in the bedroom as well as in your general relationship. I’ll talk about general things first and then get to the naughty stuff…
So everyone has their own boundaries, their limits as to what takes them from being comfortable
to uncomfortable. And it’s important in a relationship to express this right from the start.
Public displays of affection: This varies from person to person and couple to couple but it’s very important that you get this kind of thing out of the way before you find yourself in a very embarrassing situation. Not being open about this could land you in two opposite ends of an embarrassing situation. On one hand, you could find your new partner to be extremely comfortable with public displays of affection and you quite simply are not. So you’ll get embarrassed when they
start playing tonsil tennis with you in-front of everyone eating in the same pizza place as you and you have to ruin the mood by pushing them away. Switching to the other hand, you couldn’t care less about wrapping your arms around your new partner in-front of everyone but it turns out they hate it and push you away. You’re going to feel pretty foolish after that. So just talk about it. Downright ask them whether they are comfortable with or, tell them if you’re not. This will save any embarrassment and awkward moments that could completely ruin the mood in your relationship.

On a quick side note, it’s possible that if one partner doesn’t like public displays of affection
that the other will think this is because they don’t want to be seen with them. That’s why getting this out of the way before it actually happens could prevent a serious argument.


8. Do focus on the positive things

This doesn’t just mean in your relationship, this means for your entire life too. Just like life,
things that happen in relationships can often get you down and it’s hard to stay positive about where things are going to end up. But just because you have one little argument about something stupid, doesn’t mean you should be considering calling the whole thing off and starting again. Arguments happen and you need to deal with that. What makes the relationship work is how these arguments
actually affect you both. If you can accept them as arguments and get through them, then you could be on your way to something really special. But if you hold the arguments close to your heart and keep the emotions inside you then things could turn ugly. One good way to put arguments into
perspective and getting through them is to just think about the positive things that the relationship has brought you so far. Think about the fun times you’ve had together, or even the fun times you’re planning to have together. Think about how much they make you smile and laugh and how much happier you’ve been since you entered this new relationship with that person. If you can’t think
about these things, then maybe it’s time to think about whether you should’ve started this relationship in the first place.

Being happy in general is a great way to stay happy in a relationship. Happiness is infectious
and if you’re happy, your partner will feel happy too. A great book by Jenna Louise share some amazing tips on happiness and a groundbreaking exercise called “The Happy Jar.”

9. Don’t try to fix your partner 

As I mentioned before, it’s pretty tough finding someone that is genuinely your ideal partner.
Finding a perfect relationship is even harder. That why it’s important to accept that there might be a few things about your new partner that you don’t like, or could at least live without. You can’t keep trying to change the way they are, how they dress or even their accent. That is them and you were the one who entered in this relationship so you need to accept this. Now for females, it could be exciting for you to try and change your man and dress him the way you want. This is healthy and it can be quite fun and playful, but don’t take it too far. If you didn’t like his style at all then why would you have entered the relationship with him in the first place?

You could seriously annoy him if all you’re trying to do is change him, he’ll start to wonder if you even like him at all. Keep it fun, but don’t overdo it. There is the chance that you find something
out about your partner that you genuinely can’t put up with. If this is the case you need to act fast. Tell them what it is and why you don’t like it, and see if they would be willing to stop or change it. If not then you need to decide whether you can stay with them. It’s important when telling them to be calm and non-judgemental. Don’t put them down for the thing that you don’t like. Just simply explain
that you understand that this is something they do or wear or whatever it may be and that you don’t like it. This also works the other way around; you need to let your partner know that they can be completely open and honest about things they might not like about you, so long as they aren’t mean about it. That way you can talk about it and see if there’s anything you can do to get through it.

10. Don’t say anything stupid 

This right here is one of the most common causes of unhappy relationships, but it’s also one of
the toughest things to stop yourself from doing if you’re in the heat of the moment. Now although this can happen, I’m not talking about saying things like “will you marry me?” and “I love you” when it’s too soon. This will obviously test a new relationship, but if things are going well anyway then this shouldn’t be a problem and should be something the two of you can laugh about.

What I’m actually talking about is saying hurtful nasty comments when in a heated argument
that you’ll regret later. This is so common and I’m sure most of you reading this will have done this at some point in your life in one way or another. It’s so important to stay as calm and logical as you can during an argument. When emotions take over there’s almost no stopping us humans from saying things we don’t necessarily mean, and this can be the cause of separation or unhappy relationships. Early on in a relationship, saying something hurtful or nasty in the heat of the moment can be a lot
worse than saying it in a long standing happy relationship. Your partner could just walk away in the blink of an eye and you might not see them again. Or, because you’re still new to each other, your partner may not express their feelings and this could manifest itself in the relationship for a long time. It’s pretty well known that holding emotions down for long periods of time can lead to huge outbursts of stress or rage and this can really lead to an unhappy relationship. Try your best to use some of the techniques I’ve already explained in the book like thinking positive or not arguing over text, to keep
things in perspective and control your emotions. One argument shouldn’t be enough to ruin a relationship, but if you let your emotions get the better of your words then you could see yourself starting from scratch again or in a long, unhappy relationship.

11. Do be honest 

I don’t think I really need to say much here. I’ve already said this a thousand times. I just can’t stress the importance of being honest in relationships.

Not just in new relationships but in all relationships. The good thing about reading this book though is that you will hopefully be able to start a relationship completely truthfully and you will be stress free as far as your relationship is concerned. You should always start as you mean to go on. You might have met this person and entered a new relationship with them but never really thought this
was the one. You were just enjoying it so you let things flow the way they were flowing.

That’s fair enough and happens a lot. But if you choose to let this be your reason for lying, or cheating then you could be shooting yourself in the foot from the word go. This relationship that you don’t see as being the one you want for the rest of your life could soon change. You could realise how much you love this person and just how great they are. Then what are you going to do? Carry on
the relationship for the rest of your life after having started it by lying or cheating…or both? The best thing in any relationship is to just be open, honest and faithful. You’ll never be able to take those actions back and they could haunt you for the rest of your life.

A side note to anyone reading who has in fact entered a relationship and already lied or cheated but wants to put it right. Well firstly, there will be no putting it right. You’ve done what you did and you can’t blame anyone but yourself. The only thing you can do if you want to stay in this relationship
and not have everything hanging over your head all of the time is come clean ASAP. You’re going to have to come clean as soon as you can and accept that whatever happens is always going to be your fault. Your partner may leave you, and that is understandable…would you stay with them? Or your partner could choose to stay with you. This can work out if they can genuinely forgive you and move on, but it can also cause problems if they can’t really move on from it. Would you want to risk it?


12. Do request, but don’t demand

New relationships are fun and the beginning stages are a great way to set the scene for the rest of
your time together. You can take advantage of this early stage in the relationship by once again, being open and honest, and telling your partner the things you like in relationships from a partner and things you don’t like. But you need to be very careful about the way you phrase such things. You can’t be demanding and word it in ways that will make your partner feel like if they don’t do what you say then you will leave them. That’s blackmail and even if you get what you want temporarily, it won’t last. You need to tell them with an open mind, with a tone that suggests you don’t mind either way what happens but you just thought you’d let them know in case they agree or would want to do
things like that for you. If there are deal breakers for you that mean you would be really unhappy if your partner didn’t do certain things for you or with you then you need to get this out in the open quickly so that you can separate if they wouldn’t be happy doing those things. You should also be listening carefully to what your partner might be saying in conversation. When they tell you stories,
it might be that they really enjoy what they’re talking about and this is something they’d like to do with you. If you’d like to do that with them then you should suggest it, this could put you so high up in their goodbooks that you’ll be living happily ever after.

But if there’s something that you feel they really want to do that you don’t like the sound of then you need to tell them so they know. If they find out further down the line, you could both end up getting more hurt than you needed to.

A quick side note: This definitely applies in the bedroom too. There may be things you or your partner want to try or have tried before that the other isn’t comfortable with.

You can’t demand they do this, but you can request and if they like the sound of it then that’s great. If not then you shouldn’t ever pressure them into doing anything, if you’re looking for someone who enjoys different things in the bedroom and you can’t do without those things then you need to stop
the relationship before you’re tempted to look elsewhere.



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

HOW TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN A MAN AND A WOMAN'S FRIENDSHIP

Friendship Facts

Here are more findings about the differences in friendships between men and women:

• Women spend more time talking to friends on the phone.
• Men work on more projects with their friends.
• Men and women like to talk about different topics: Women are more likely to talk about relationships and personal issues. Men are more likely to talk about impersonal interests like sports and their accomplishments.

YOU FOUND THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE, THEN WHAT

Right, here I’m going to assume that you’ve found someone you genuinely really like, are attracted to and starting a romantic relationship with. This isn’t for someone who’s found that person and wants to learn the secrets to attracting them.

There are certain do’s and don’ts that can make or break a relationship that many people just don’t realise. The repercussions of actions and words in the early stages of a relationship can manifest themselves in a relationship for as long as it lasts; which can lead to some very unhappy couples. I’m going to write this so it applies for both females and males as much as possible, but where things are different for each I will separate them and write a part for females and a part for males…



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

HOW TO FIND THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE

Ok this isn’t going to be long, firstly because it’s not always the best idea to be searching to find a special someone and secondly the actual dating process is a whole different book. But what I would like to say is that there’s no harm in being picky. Knowing what you want is one of the most important things to entering a successful relationship, or any other venture you face in life. It’s
knowing what you want that keeps you striving to achieve your best and not settling for second best.

If you want someone rich, someone with black hair, someone who makes you laugh then don’t stop until you have that. Fortunately love doesn’t tend to happen when someone meets a certain criteria that we set, it usually happens when someone fills us with positive emotions and we become addicted to that feeling. Be picky, but don’t be logical. Logic has no place in actual romance and never will do. You hear countless love stories where the poor, ugly nice guy eventually gets the girl, or the girl
who’s just looking for a sensible man keeps falling in love with the bad boys. This is because our emotions over-ride any logical thoughts we have when it comes to falling for someone.


Another reason I don’t advise searching for that special someone is because coming from the mentality that you want to find love puts you in a vulnerable place. You will be more likely to let your guard down when you meet someone who could potentially be someone you like, and you will let yourself fall for someone that normally you wouldn’t fall for.

Let’s look at a ‘hypothetical’ scenario. There are two boys that have grown up together (could just as well be girls) and they have been friends all their lives. They grew up playing together on the street, riding their bicycles and pulling pranks on other kids. As they start to get older they start to feel attraction for other people and start to act on this. Now one boy falls in love with the first
girl that he has any romantic connection with. He has that ideal teenage relationship that you see in the movies, and it ends up lasting the rest of his life. This is great, and extremely romantic.

Let’s see what happened to his friend. His friend ended up getting into a few romantic connections with various girls. He decided that whilst he is young he doesn’t want a committed relationship in case it holds him back in life before he achieves all of his goals. OK this isn’t really very romantic, and a few readers will be thinking “playaaa” but that’s not quite the picture I’m trying to paint. Let’s say he hasn’t had any one night stands, he takes his time to get to know girls and he’s very honest about not wanting relationships with them.

Then whilst he is living his life, meeting girls and having fun he finds himself extremely confused. There’s a girl he’s seeing that has really captured his heart. He just can’t stop thinking about her and she’s exactly what he would want if he wanted to settle down with someone. He knows this because he has experienced many romantic connections with various girls so he knows the things he likes
in a girl and the things he doesn’t like. Anyway he pushes these feelings into the back of his mind because he still feels that he’s young and doesn’t want a relationship. But the feelings persist. He keeps seeing the girl and starts to become overwhelmed by the feelings he has for her. He still feels like he doesn’t want a relationship but the feelings he has are so strong that he’s starting to change his mind. Eventually the feelings become that strong that they change what he has believed all of his life, and he decides to enter a committed relationship with this girl because she is exactly what he wants in a girl and the feelings he has for her are so intense.

Now I’ll let you be the judge of which path was more romantic, but which path do you think will lead to the more stable, secure relationship?



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

My Beautiful Distraction