THE MYTH OF REASONABLENESS IN RELATIONSHIP

Cay's Story

Years ago, a client of mine took a temporary job that placed her in the company of a man she had once been engaged to marry. Ry was powerful, attractive, sensual, and obsessive. Cay had broken off their engagement when Ry’s behavior had become suffocating and exhausting. He had not exactly stalked her afterward, but he had made it clear that he was not giving up on her. She had stayed clear of him for a year and felt safe that of her life was behind her and that they had both moved on. When
her boss placed her on assignment in Ry’s company, Cay had the option of refusing the placement, but she didn’t really think that was necessary, even though she had a dragging feeling in the pit of her stomach. Whenever doubts occurred, she would argue with herself in a bracing way and insist to herself that they would merely have a professional relationship.



Yet it was soon apparent that the chemistry between them was far from gone. Whenever they were together, there was a charge in the room like ozone in the air before a lightning storm. Cay
noticed people glancing back and forth between them, assessing the drama beneath the surface. At that point, she began to experience a division in herself. (When you feel divided, split down the
middle, or awash with feelings that don’t match your thoughts, it can be a sign that brilliant sanity is battling with the prerecorded message to be reasonable.)

Cay felt depressed and tired, physically dragged down, and she was having difficulty concentrating. But she was also feeling flattered by Ry’s attentions. He was the dominant male in their work environment, the big boss, and he was attractive and dynamic. She felt feminine and desirable under the hot spotlight of his attraction. Cay spent more time talking with herself, arguing with some deeper awareness, and insisting that it was a manageable situation. Because she was arguing with her own core of wisdom, she began to feel confused. Perhaps, she wondered, she had made a mistake to break off their engagement—after all, Ry clearly still passionately cared for her after all this time. It was
also clear that many women at the company found him extremely attractive and would have loved to be the object of his attention.

Whenever she tried to reason out the situation, instead of arriving at a logical conclusion, her thoughts took her in a circle, like an amusement park ride, and left her disoriented and fatigued.

But the brilliant sanity inside us is never extinguished, no matter how we refute it or confuse ourselves. It crops up in feelings, thoughts, coincidences, and dreams. In the midst of her situation,
Cay began to have startling nightmares. In one dream, some thugs held her hostage and forced her to build a box of some kind. With growing horror, she realized that she was actually building a coffin, and that it was her own coffin! When she completed the task, the men dragged her outside, gave her a shovel, and ordered her to dig. Shaking with fear, she realized she was digging her own grave. At that point, she woke up with a start.

Let’s consider this dream together. It is easy to see that something is wrong. Cay felt that the dream might have had to do with her dislike of her work because it was boring and didn’t provide her with an opportunity to grow. But instinctively, as we explored it, both Cay and I sensed that the drama of her dream was so intense that this explanation didn’t account for the horror presented. Building your own coffin is a step-by-step process, as is digging your own grave: both images hint at a progressive
movement toward a grim result. In addition, the larger plot of being held captive by thugs seems to suggest an overall lack of freedom or being controlled by others.

When Cay and I discussed the sense of feeling controlled and being a captive, she inevitably thought of the situation with Ry, partly because he had been very controlling in their former relationship, and partly because her present situation affected her in so many different ways that she was essentially paralyzed by it.

Each day she spent working there made her feel less like herself and more mesmerized and confused.
Was Ry ultimately planning to murder her? Well, that is certainly possible, but she did not feel that that was likely or that such a warning was the essential meaning of her dream. She did feel, however, that the dream was showing her the evolution of her current strategy of reasonableness and going with the flow, against what she knew deep down to be true for her: this man, their chemistry,
and the situation at his company were not good for her.

Unlike our tendency to complicate situations, dreams try to simplify them for us. Certain things and people in life make us feel more alive and nourish us, the way sunshine, water, and fresh air nourish plants. Other things and people make us feel less alive, drain our vitality, destroy our confidence, and muddle our mind. The wisdom at your core is basic: it warns you of situations that are poisonous to your vitality, to your spark, by essentially saying, “That road leads to being less alive!”

No More Crazy Love

Cay lost no time extricating herself from her assignment, and she made it clear to Ryan that the past was long over. Surprisingly, after a brief flurry of attempts to contact her, he gave up and left her alone. She also learned something about her inner wisdom that has altered the way she approaches romantic relationships in general. Cay has a compass inside that points toward what makes her happy, what gives her energy, what restores her faith and joy  in life. She has never again engaged in what she calls crazy love, that enticing alchemy of sexual energy that comes with unhealthy strings attached. She trusts her dreams and her instincts to warn her of missteps early on, and although she is not sure if she ultimately wishes to marry or not, she has rewarding, genuinely loving relationships that are fulfilling and passionate, that don’t hold her back or make her feel small. Perhaps most important, Cay feels connected with her ability to know what is true for her and to make choices based on that awareness. She feels connected with her core of wisdom, and she trusts herself.




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LOVE AFFAIR OF SUBJECTIVE

The Taboo of the Subjective

For whatever reason, it almost seems as if we were brainwashed to discount our core of instincts, intuition, and brilliant sanity.

Perhaps in our love affair with technology and science, our worship of facts and discoveries, we have become doubtful of information that presents itself through subjective awareness. Whatever the reason, it takes boldness to listen to your personal wisdom, to give it credence, to follow the warning in your gut or attend to the thought that flashes across your mind.

Many of us, myself included, try to argue with our feelings of fear, almost scolding ourselves if we feel doubtful about someone or if we feel reluctant to place ourselves at risk. It seems at times that we feel we are breaking an unspoken rule if we choose to listen to what we know and honor what is true for us. Those of us who choose to become better acquainted with the brilliance that lives inside of us must be ready to break through the taboo that we shouldn’t listen to what our intuition is telling us.






If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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FLASHES OF KNOWING

Everyone has this capacity, and one of the best ways to have it function well in our lives is to discuss it and pay attention to it. Flashes of knowing also are the part of you that lets you know when
you need to slow down, take a breath, and get back to your center if you have been racing at high speed for too long. In relationships, this coming back to your center is critical for understanding
another person and for making decisions with confidence.

Research into intuition suggests that our first impressions are quite often accurate, yet many of us have a difficult time accepting the wave of knowing that rises from within. I’ve talked to some folks who have experienced miserable marriages, and they have told me that they knew as they walked down the aisle that they were making a terrible mistake. They argued with themselves that the sense of dread they felt was simply a case of cold feet, not to be taken seriously. They told themselves
they had to be mature, to make a commitment, to keep a bargain they didn’t really want, when some knowledge of the heart said, “Don’t.”






If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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THE THREE BLINDERS OF RELATIONSHIP

Within you is a core of wisdom that Buddhist teachers call brilliant sanity. It is an intelligence that turns toward the truth the way a plant turns toward the sun: instinctively. This wisdom can operate with insufficient facts, accurately assessing the future and maintaining your sense of clarity even as you contend with situations fraught with emotion or desire. This wisdom tends not only to perceive reality clearly but also to view yourself and others with kindness and compassion. This doesn’t mean you operate like a psychic sponge, taking on the problems of others out of concern—you can maintain strong, healthy boundaries and still have compassion for others. What it does mean is that your core of brilliant sanity tends to be kind, and part of that kindness is a loving understanding
of yourself, of what you need, and of what your unique nature requires in order to feel fulfilled in a loving relationship.



You have already encountered this trait in yourself. Think about it: Do you sometimes sense who is calling when the phone rings, or know just where to look for a lost item even though someone else
misplaced it? Can you sometimes find parking places by almost feeling their location? You may know just the right thing to say to people, to help them relax or start to open up. You may know
what is really going on with others, in a way that they miss, when they experience a misunderstanding or a lack of communication. The best tool you have for navigating the landscape of love, for keeping yourself safe, for finding and nourishing the relationships you need, is this vital instinct, this deep intelligence that appears with flashes of brilliance: brilliant sanity.

Intuitive signals and dreams are two ways that your deeper core of wisdom communicates and expresses itself. There is nothing spooky about this; it is a natural part of your intelligence reflecting
aspects of your experience that may not yet be at the forefront of your awareness. In some cases, dreams and intuition appear to be almost magic because, through them, we become aware of information or insights that have been obscured or hidden. At any given time, you know more than you can be aware of consciously, and your flashes of insight and your dreams demonstrate this deeper knowing; they not only reflect what is going on in your life but also highlight what is most important to understand in your relationships.

If you are like many of the women in my classes, you are frustrated because you have excellent instincts about other people’s relationships, and feel a little blind or confused about your own.

Why is it that we can be so brilliant and intuitive about some parts of life, yet feel bewildered and cut off from our own wisdom in other parts of life?

The Three Blinders: Importance, Desire, and Fear

When a situation is extremely important to us, we have a tendency to go blank on our instincts and to overthink the situation.

When there is a powerful emotional component, and when there is something in the situation that we fear as well as something we desire, these things can clog our ability to hear our inner wisdom or understand our gut instincts. That is why when you are talking with friends about their situations you may have excellent instincts and a feeling that you know what is going on and how it will play out. But when you are trying to get a sense of clarity with a romance of your own, you may be inadvertently blocking your core knowing because of fear, desire, and a personal investment in
the outcome.

When we deal with romance, sometimes wishful thinking, small resentments, desperation and loneliness, or even a false feeling of worthlessness easily confuse us. This may ignite an urge to try to fool someone into loving us, or cause us to feel like an imposter. Both men and women feel the stakes are high, our feelings are hooked, and it is easy to feel we must captivate and conceal our “flaws” in order to be loved. Of course, these thoughts are illusions, but when we deal with fear and desire, we
tend to drift away from that core of brilliant sanity and forget not only what we really want but also who we really are. When we abandon the core self, for whatever reason, we also detach from our intuition and our truth-detector.

If you have been hurt by love (and who hasn’t?), you may search for a partner, but all the while be tracing your scars and probing old wounds. When you meet new people, the matchmaker in your
heart may feel a flutter of hope while the district attorney in your mind is ready to indict them for crimes they could never have committed. I know people who strap on their bitterness when they
go out to meet someone new, like a western gunslinger buckling his gun belt, and then wait, hand poised over their weapon, for a person to make one false move so they can gun him down. It is
understandable that even the most resilient among us is wary and bruised, and that in the search for companionship we alternate between romantic fantasies and flinty-eyed cynicism.

Despite these tendencies to approach the topic of love with divided concerns, your instinct for happiness is still intact, and your ability to know what is real and to do the right thing for yourself
is alive and well. The brilliance at your core is always speaking to you through your dreams and your subtle intuitions. If you slow down and listen, you will often find that you already know what is
true about a situation and that you already know how you really feel about someone.




If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHAT A GIRL WANTS AND WHAT A GIRL NEEDS

Welcome back to reality.

I hope I made you think a bit. No more cheesy Hollywood films for the rest of the book, I promise!

Just as men have many traits in common (we like nice tits, asses, cute faces and big cars — or at least, most of us do), it’s the same with women. Even if they seem so different at times, they have many similarities in the way they think and especially in what they’re looking for in a man. I would like to give you an exercise. I know, I know … You hate those, but I promise you’ll enjoy this one.

Call up one of your friend girls, a girl you’re not dating and would consider to be a friend.
You might have wanted to lay her before, or vice versa, but it doesn’t matter now. Following is a list. Read it to her as if you’re describing her character. I guarantee that she’ll be surprised. If you did this to a random girl you didn’t even know, she would be like, “Wow, how do you know all this about me? Are you psychic or something?”



THE LIST:
1. Sometimes you’re very emotional. At times like these, you don’t follow your common sense; it’s your feelings that guide you. Like when you’re with a guy, you don’t think with your mind; you don’t think rationally. Instead, you listen to your emotions and what your heart says about him.
2. On the other hand, you have a wild side as well. Sometimes you’re into adventures, challenges, doing wild things. You can even surprise yourself by doing something you never would have thought of.
3. In your relationships, you usually stay passive and expect the man to lead. You want a real man who can do it. On a first date or in a longer relationship, you don’t like to decide where to go. You like it when the man chooses the theater, the film and arranges everything — even when he tells you where to sit.
4. You like surprises. Most of your relationships become boring as time goes by. You get used to the same routines, places and boring sex. You want variety and changes. You want your man to surprise you sometimes and keep you on your toes, to feel the excitement of something new and unknown happening. You want a man who is creative enough to surprise you.
5. Little details are important to you. You always take a look at a man’s hands or shoes to see if they’re clean. Sometimes romantic moments, like holding your boyfriend’s hand, hugging and kissing, or just receiving a little, thoughtful something, are much more important than big, expensive gifts. Getting a postcard or a phone call and knowing that your boyfriend, or someone you care for, is thinking about you can make you really happy. Such small details can mean more to you than a big bank account or an expensive car.
6. You are oftentimes mildly critical of yourself. You stand in front of the mirror, looking here and there and noticing if something isn’t right. You’re looking for minor flaws or imperfections on your body. You hate to admit it, but sometimes you might even enjoy this. At times like this, you need a little validation. A compliment about your looks or an inquiring glance from a man can increase your self-esteem.
7. You also have very difficult, self-critical periods. When this happens, it’s not easy to tolerate you, and sometimes you wish that everybody would go away and leave you alone. You might be rude to people and guys even when you don’t intend to be. (Note: Women have periods. While periods don’t directly control men, women’s menstruation cycles play an important role in their lives. They sometimes get out of bed on the wrong side and are influenced too much by their emotions. A woman is more likely to brush you off on a bad day or when she’s having her period.)
8. Deep inside, you still believe in love at first sight. But it never really happened to you. You have a picture of the ideal man in your head, your Prince Charming, who will sweep you off your feet, put you on his white horse and rescue you from the castle. In each of your new relationships, you fantasize about it being perfect, but it never is. Your boyfriends might measure up to 60–70 percent of your ideal guy, but something is always missing.
9. When dating a new guy, it usually takes four to five dates before you say you’re going out with him. You want the man to initiate the first kiss, and you usually test a man. You set up hoops and expect him to jump through them. Sometimes you test men too much.
10. About sex: You like it when it “just happens.” You don’t like to plan anything in advance whether it’s the first time or the 100th. You like to be swept away by the moment. In bed, you stay passive, but take control when your wild side comes out. You like to experiment and try out new things.

So, what was the response? Was she stunned? How did you know all that about her? Don’t tell her you read about it in a book, OK? ☺ Remember what the list says? Excitement and surprises. Keep her on her toes. She’ll be speculating about where you got this info. Joke with her. Tell her you have a sixth sense or whatever. Just don’t tell the truth. If you want to strengthen the effect, you can even memorize the list. It’s not that hard. You might try acting like a prophet and “read” the list items in her cards, her palm or something else.

The list is a general description of an average girl who is in her early 20s and likes going out to clubs. Although it’s an amusing tool, it will help you get to know women better. Read that list many times, and notice the keywords: a real man, staying passive, expecting him to lead, emotions, excitement, variety, little details, being critical about herself and others, periods, love at first sight, Prince Charming. I’m going to talk about these in detail. For men, keywords would be something like: hot girls, good sex, cute faces, big tits and sexy butts, rational thinking, racing and competition, challenge, sports and cars. Compare the two, and you’ll begin to realize why it seems so hard to understand women at times. Ready for more fun? Read on.



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

THE BRAIN IS THE LARGEST ORGAN

The Brain Is the Largest Sex Organ (and Size Matters!)


  • As you walk by me, millions of nerve cells spark in my brain and I have to turn to look at you again.
  • You look back at me and a soft, brief smile forms on your lips. As you notice my eyes following you, your smile triggers an adrenaline release that causes my heart to leap with excitement.
  • Chemicals send increased blood flow to sensitive areas, as thoughts of you light the emotional fire centers of my mind.
  • For a brief moment you literally live in my skin.
  • As we connect, my mind works overtime obsessing on your smell and the color of your eyes.
  • You beat in my heart.
  • You pulse in my nervous system from the nerve pathways of my brain to the soles of my feet.
  • I start to become disoriented when we are apart.
  • Over time, your touch becomes essential.
  • I crave you.
  • Your body feels warm and reassuring.
  • I need it next to me.
  • I sleep peacefully knowing you are near, and wake often in the dark to feel your skin.
  • I never want to get out of bed when I am lying next to you.
  • I look for you in my brain when you are away.
  • Your voice sweetens the vibrations in the air.
  • My mind beseeches me to make love to you, again and again.
  • Our bodies navigate space together.
  • Your mind reads mine as you know how I want to be touched.
  • How does that happen?
  • You must have cells that mirror my desires.
  • The neurons of my eyes light up with sparks when you walk in a room, especially if you have been away for a while.
  • Songs, smells, places, and pictures never let me forget you as they trigger the memory centers in my brain where you live as if you were next to me.
  • The judgment part of my brain watches what I say when we are together so I can protect your feelings.
  • I watch how your eyes, face, and body move as you talk to me, to know if you are happy, desirous, or in need of a hug or understanding.


Even though it feels genital, the vast majority of love and sex occurs in the brain. Your brain decides who is attractive to you, how to get a date, how well you do on the date, what to do with the feelings that develop, how long those feelings last, when to commit, and how well you do as a partner and a parent. Your brain helps you be enthusiastic in the bedroom or drains you of desire and passion. Your brain helps you process and learn from a breakup or makes you vulnerable to depression or obsession. When the brain works right, it helps you be thoughtful, playful, romantic, intimate, committed, and loving with your partner. When the brain is dysfunctional, it causes you to be
impulsive, distracted, addicted, unfaithful, angry, and even hateful, thus ruining chances for continued intimacy and love.

Your brain is also the seat of orgasms. Some research implicates the right hemisphere of the brain. In fact, certain forms of epilepsy, especially those found in the right temporal lobe, have been associated with spontaneous orgasms. In one case from Taiwan, a forty-one-year old woman had seizures that were induced only when she brushed her teeth. The seizure started with the feelings of being sexually aroused, then she felt an orgasmlike euphoria wash over her, which was followed by feelings of confusion. Her brain-imaging studies showed problems in the right temporal lobe, an area that has been associated with both orgasms and religious experience. When someone has orgasmiclike feelings when brushing her teeth, odds are that she will have very clean pearly whites.

Scientists agree that the brain is the organ of behavior; as such, it really is the largest sex organ in the body (about three pounds), and in this case size really does matter. Our brain becomes less and less active and decreases in overall size as we age. This is true for males and females and there appears to be an equal loss of gray matter (nerve cell bodies) and white matter (the connections between nerve cells). If you learn to take care of your brain, however, it can be active and healthy throughout your life. With targeted interventions, you can impact brain health, lose less brain tissue, and keep your brain healthy well into your elderly years.

Why does this matter to sexual function? As the brain dims in activity over the decades, so, too, does many people’s sexual function. The two go together. In men between the ages of forty and seventy studied over a nine-year period, there was a signi􀀳cant decline in sexual function with age. This is consistent with past studies that have shown a decline in sexual desire, intercourse, and erection frequency. Erectile dysfunction (ED) is very common and increases with age. Forty percent of men in their forties, and 70 percent in their seventies had problems. In women, aging and menopause often negatively affect sexual interest and performance.
A major reason underlying both sexual and brain dysfunction is decreased blood flow. Blood does so many important things. It brings oxygen, sugar, and nutrients to your cells and it takes away waste products. Anything that interferes with healthy blood flow will impair an oxygen, sugar, and nutrients to your cells and it takes away waste products. Anything that interferes with healthy blood flow will impair an organ’s functioning. Decreased blood flow to genitals from hypertension; vascular disease; diabetes; toxic exposure, such as drug abuse or smoking; physical trauma; and other causes impairs sexual function. Increased blood flow, from targeted interventions including exercise, ginkgo, and compounds that increase nitric oxide, such as Viagra and ginseng, improves function and reverses aging.

Likewise, decreased blood flow to your brain, from any cause, decreases brain function, which means you are likely to make impaired decisions and subsequently have less sex. Few scientists have looked at the connection between brain health and sexual behavior. That’s where I come in. My primary work is as a brain-imaging specialist. I have been doing imaging work for more than sixteen years and my clinics have the world’s largest database of scans related to behavior, more than 35,000. We look at the brain on a daily basis using a sophisticated study called SPECT imaging. SPECT stands for “single photon emission computed tomography,” a nuclear medicine study that evaluates blood 􀀷ow and activity patterns in the brain. We have looked at many healthy brains and brains in trouble. We have looked at the brains of children, teenagers, adults, and the elderly. We have looked at brains on medications, drug and alcohol abuse, supplements, prayer and meditation, gratitude, and a wide variety of psychological and biological treatments. We have looked at the brain in love, lust,
commitment, divorce, domestic violence, sexual abuse, and loss.

At our clinics, our primary work is to help maximize people’s brain function for the most satisfying and healthy life possible. We help healthy people who want to improve their own brain function, as well as treat attention deficit disorders (ADD), mood and anxiety disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorders, addictions, temper problems, and memory disturbances. We often help individuals and couples who struggle with relationship and sexual problems of all kinds. It is really possible to dramatically improve brain function, whether your brain is troubled or not, and thus dramatically improve your life. Our guiding principle for the past sixteen years has been “Change your brain,
change your life.”

Since most people cannot see the brain, it is often left out of the equations of our lives. Yet, it is at the core of our personal universe. Connecting sex and the brain through the lens of brain imaging has been one of the most fascinating journeys of my life, and I will share it with you in this book. I became much more effective in helping couples when I started looking at their relationships and sexuality together with brain function. It is clear that healthy brain function is associated with more loving and sexual relationships, while poor brain function is associated with more lighting, less sex, and higher divorce rates. In committed relationships, sex is a critical ingredient for health and longevity, but most people never connect the brain and sex. I start with a clear bias: Sex is best in the context of a committed, loving relationship. Anthropologist Helen Fisher writes, “Do not copulate
with people you do not want to fall in love with, because you might do just that.” Sex bonds you to others, and in some cases, if you are not careful and thoughtful, it can put you in bondage to others. Although this is my bias, it is not always the context of some of the research studies I will share with you on the sexual benefits for health and longevity, which are based solely on sexual frequency.

Having acknowledged that fact, there are other studies that strongly suggest a happy marriage is also associated with longevity, which usually means not sharing yourself sexually outside your primary relationship. The discussion throughout the book is on heterosexual relationships, but the same principles apply to all committed, loving relationships.

Based on my latest research, this book will share twelve practical neuroscience lessons to enhance your love and sex life. Practical neuroscience is a term I coined for the study of applying the latest brain research to everyday life. I am the type of person, like many of you, who always wants to know why I should learn something. If it isn’t practical or helpful, then I don’t want to expend great amounts of neuronal effort on it. The reason to study neuroscience is that it is immensely practical.

Here’s an example:
On a recent faculty retreat with the University of California, Irvine Department of Psychiatry, where I teach psychiatric residents, I was walking back from dinner through a shopping district along the quaint cobblestone streets of Taormina, Sicily, with one of my colleagues and his wife. They were talking about buying shoes. The wife wanted her husband to go with her to the shoe boutique and he was balking a bit. I looked at him and said, “You want to go with her.” He gave me a quizzical look which said, “Why?”

I replied, “In the brain, the sensory area of the foot is right next door to the sensory area for the clitoris. Unknowingly, women often feel that buying shoes is like foreplay. Feet are one of the best ways to a woman’s affections.” With my friend’s help, his wife bought three pairs of shoes the next day. He had a smile on his face for the rest of the trip.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

WHAT ROMANTIC WAYS WILL MAKE YOUR PARTNER HAPPY

1. As a special gift, name a Star after your partner. A number of astronomical agencies allow individuals to name stars and you receive formal documentation identifying the star that you have named.

2. Find a comic strip that relates to something that you and your partner have shared together, for example perhaps you both work in the same office and you find a Dilbert cartoon that relates to the politics at your workplace. Enlarge the cartoon using a photocopier and use white-out to cover the
cartoon text. Type up your own text that relates to you and your partner and paste it in the appropriate places and then photocopy the cartoon again so that it looks like your text was the actual text of the cartoon. For an added touch, get your customized cartoon laminated before giving it to your partner.

3. When you and your partner are enjoying a restful time away, organize to wake up early one morning and go to a scenic spot to watch the sun rise. This may seem difficult but it is something which is definitely worth doing at least once. Seeing a new day being born is something really special to share with your partner.


4. When you have access to a spa, create a romantic atmosphere by placing some candles around the tub and some rose petals floating on the surface of the water.
As your partner enjoys the water, serve champagne and chocolate covered strawberries before joining her.

5. Create some love coupons that your partner can exchange for romantic favors.
For example you could have a coupon that reads
This coupon entitles the bearer to:
One Body Massage.
Use by 07/08/2020

Use a date many years in the future if you want to suggest that you and your partner will always be together.

6. On a warm summers night, organize a backyard picnic. Spread a picnic blanket on the ground and get together some snacks, chocolates and champagne. Lie down on the blanket with your partner and gaze up at the stars together.

7. Next time it is raining really heavily, go for a walk with your partner. Forget the umbrellas and the raincoats. Run through the streets together, jump in puddles and get totally saturated. Pick her up, twirl her around and kiss her while the rain falls. Taste the water off her face and hold her close.
When you get back home have a hot shower and then share a warm drink preferably in front of an open fire.

8. Organize a hot air ballooning trip as a special surprise. Most trips begin with a glass of champagne before you float over the countryside with your partner.

9. When your partner is sitting at a table or desk, come up behind him or her and give her a back, shoulder and head massage. Finish with a gentle kiss on the cheek.

10. Place an ad in the paper on a normal day saying something like:

Dear Wendy,
With you by my side, everyday feels like Valentines Day.
Thank you for being you.
Love,
Peter

11. Buy a book that you and your partner are both interested in reading. Read one chapter each night in bed with each of you taking turns to read out loud. This can be a great alternative to television.

12. When your partner is having a shower or bath, take her towel and place it in the dryer to make it really warm and then wrap her up in it when she is done.

13. Photocopy your hand and fax a copy of it to your partner with a message saying, "Do ya wanna hold hands?"

14. Next time you order a pizza, ask to have it cut into a heart shape before it is delivered to your home.

15. Buy a box of chocolates and very carefully open one side of the plastic wrap so that you can gently slide the box out. Open the box and place a love note inside. Then slide the box back into its plastic wrap and reseal it.

16. Rent a tandem bike and go for a ride with your partner. At the end of your ride have a picnic in the park.

17. If you are away on a business trip, document a day in your life for your partner. For example:

'A Day In The Life Of Mark'
6am: Just woke up and thought of you - Wish you were laying next to me. Well, I better get ready for work.
7am: Am on the train. It's crowded; everyone looks like they are half dead. I miss ya heaps.
8.30am: Have just organized my day, it's going to be a busy one.
9.30am: Am in the middle of a really boring meeting. I am trying to concentrate on this months sales figures but I keep thinking of your beautiful eyes.
6.30pm: Thank goodness the day is over. I am counting the days until we’re together again.
Send your letter to your partner. This is a wonderful way to tell your partner how often you think about her during the day and to share your life with her in a special way.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;)
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR WIFE HAPPIER IN 26 ROMANTIC WAYS


1. When your spouse has had a really long hard day, run a hot bath for her. Pour some fragrant bath oil into the tub and gently bathe her from head to toe. Carry her into the bedroom. Gently towel her dry and tuck her into a freshly made bed with a kiss on the forehead.

2. For this idea you will need a portable CD player. If you and your partner have a favorite song, get a copy of it on CD and take it with you when you go away for a romantic weekend. When you are in a romantic spot, ask your partner if she would like to dance. Place one earpiece in her ear and one in your own and enjoy your private dance floor.

This technique is particularly effective if the romantic spot you have chosen is somewhere where people would not normally dance, for example, the top of the Empire State building at sunset or on top of a mountain during a camping trip.

3. If your partner has a pet that she adores, at Christmas, in addition to buying a gift for your partner, buy a small present for her pet.

4. Go for a walk on the beach. Trace out the shape of a large love heart in the sand. Sit inside the heart and cuddle your partner as you watch the sun go down.



5. Invite your partner to go for a walk. Get a back pack and pack the following items: A picnic blanket, a selection of fruit in small containers eg. strawberries, grapes, watermelon and kiwi fruit. Some cheese and crackers. Some sandwiches. A small tin of caviar. A half bottle of champagne and two plastic champagne glasses. If your partner asks what's in the backpack, just say a jacket and some lunch.

When you find a romantic spot, ask if she would like to stop for a bite to eat. Open your pack and remove the items one by one to set up your picnic. The last item you remove should be the glasses and champagne.

6. If you play a musical instrument, create a romantic environment in which to play for your partner. For example, let's say you play the saxophone. Contact your partner's roommate and arrange for her to make sure that your partner steps out onto the balcony of their apartment at exactly 9.30pm.
Drive to her apartment and set up before hand. Place a large sparkler in the music holder of your sax and light it as your partner steps on to the balcony. Play something slow and romantic.

 7. Use this idea if your partner is going to work and you are staying at home for some reason (Perhaps you are sick or are working from home). Say goodbye to her at the front door and then immediately send an email to her work address. The email should simply say,"Miss you already".
The email will be in her in-box when she does her morning email check.

8. If your partner has long hair, take the time to brush it using long slow strokes. This is particularly effective after she has had a shower or when she is getting ready for bed.

9. On a special occasion like your partner's birthday, plan a treasure hunt for her. The fun begins when you suggest going for a walk on the beach. When you get to the beach, carry a small bag with you. The bag contains a bottle that you prepared earlier. Inside the bottle is a treasure map. To make
the treasure map look authentic, burn the edges with a match. As you are walking, slip the bottle out of your bag and let it drop to the sand near the water's edge. You may have to pause and kiss your partner to do this unnoticed. Walk a little further up the beach then turn around and retrace your steps to 'discover' the bottle. On the map have a dotted line leading from the beach to a nearby cafe. At
the cafe, your partner won't know what to look for so suggest that you just sit down and have a cup of coffee.

When the waitress delivers the coffee, she suggests to your partner that she might find what she is looking for under the coaster. When your partner turns over the coaster she finds a key taped to the bottom. Obviously you will have to set this up before hand with the waitress. Most waitresses will be happy to help a romantic guy out with this type of thing.

At the next stop on the map, your partner finds or is given a spade. Then at the last stop on the map your partner finds a large 'X' made up of two crossed sticks. She digs and discovers a locked box. The key unlocks the box to reveal her present.

10. Invite your partner on a date by sending her a plain brown envelope containing a tape. On the tape, record the Mission Impossible sound track and then record yourself saying, “Your mission if you choose to accept it is to make your way to Café Venoli, 123 Park Lane at 18.30 Eastern Standard
Time. There you will rendezvous with a stunningly attractive man wearing a red carnation. The future of the free world is now in your hands. This tape will self destruct in five seconds.” Then record ten beeps from a stopwatch and record yourself saying, “Would you believe ten seconds…” Its corny but it usually gets a laugh!

11. Contact your partner's family and ask if there was anything she always wanted when she was a little girl. For example if she always wanted a porcelain doll, buy one for her birthday. She will not only appreciate the gift but also the fact that you were thoughtful enough to find out what she always wanted.

12. Organize a professional photo shoot to obtain a portrait of the two of you as a couple. Frame the picture and put it somewhere prominent. Remember to make sure you give your partner plenty of notice so that she can get ready.

13. Write a note saying "I thought of you today, and it made me smile." Leave the note somewhere where your partner is sure to find it.

14. For Valentines Day, buy your partner a charm bracelet with at least 14 charms.
Remove all the charms and let your partner 'find' one charm each day for the first fourteen days of February. On Valentines Day give her the bracelet and any remaining charms.

15. When you and your partner are in a shopping center or airport, stop at one of those booths that allow you to take an instant photo and print them out as stickers.

Choose a romantic background and kiss your partner while the photo is being taken.

16. If your partner has voice mail at work or on her mobile, leave a message saying "Just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you." She will appreciate this anytime but especially when she is going through a rough period.

17. Organize a mystery trip for you and your partner. Some travel agents will organize mystery packages where the destination of the trip is kept secret until you are actually on the plane or arrive at the destination.

18. Buy some rose petals and place them behind the sun visor on the passenger side of your car. Take a post it note and write, "I Love You" on it and stick it to the back of the sun visor.

As you are driving to a romantic destination, look at your partner and tell her she has a mark on her cheek. She will pull down the sun visor to use the mirror and be showered in rose petals and see your note.

19. If your partner is going on a trip, pack a small present into the corner of her suitcase that she will find when she is away.

20. When you and your partner are having an anniversary, buy two champagne glasses and get them engraved with your names and the date, for example:

Kiel and Katherine
7 May 2002

Go to the restaurant where you have made your reservations and request that when you and your partner arrive that your champagne be served in your special glasses. This will be a great surprise for your partner and a wonderful keepsake for you both.

21. On a special occasion such as your partner's birthday, buy twenty-four red roses. Arrange to meet her at a specific spot in a shopping mall before going out for dinner. Get to the shopping mall early and position yourself around the corner from your meeting spot.

Ask a guy who is walking by whether he would mind helping you out. Give him a rose, point out your partner and ask him to walk up to her and say, "Happy Birthday Meagan" and give her the rose and then walk away. Repeat this with eleven other guys. Choose guys who are not too good looking and choose guys of different ages. A nice touch is to have the last rose delivered by a small child who could even by accompanied by his parents. After the first twelve flowers have been delivered, approach your partner with the twelve remaining roses.

22. Always listen for things that your partner reminisces about and jot them down somewhere. For example, perhaps she talks about the ice cream that she had from a particular shop when she was a little girl. When a special occasion comes along, check your list of things that your partner talks about and try to recreate one of them, for example, visit the shop and buy a tub of ice cream making sure that the name of the shop is on the container.

23. Create a love montage by collecting some photographs of you and your partner, some ticket stubs of places you have visited and any other small odds and ends that have special meaning to you both.
Take these items and get them professionally framed in a three dimensional montage. Alternatively, buy a frame and create a simple montage yourself.

24. Buy an ornately carved wooden box which is lined with green or red felt. Find an old fashioned key and place it in the box. Next, get a small gold plaque and have it engraved with the words
The Key To My Heart Fix the plaque to the inside of the top of the box so that it can be read when
the box is opened.

25. Buy a tree with your partner and plant it in a special spot. Each year on your anniversary, have a glass of champagne next to your tree and talk about how your love and the tree have grown.

26. If you shower first in the morning. Steam up the bathroom and write a
message such as "Pete Loves Kathy" on the mirror for your partner to read
when she uses the bathroom. This also works on car windows when it's cold.


If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

CHOOSE WHAT WILL BE THE BEST IDEA TO MAKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND HAPPY

A. If your partner has to work late, take a lunch box and fill it with some of her favorite things such as chocolates, herbal tea, cookies, a small teddy bear. Next, get a piece of paper and write
"Michelle's Late Night Survival Pack" Draw a big red cross below this and stick the paper to the top of the box. Tell your partner to open the box when things get really tough.


B.  If you are walking by a park, visit the swings and give your partner a ride. This will often bring back happy memories from her childhood.


C. Leave a long stem rose where your partner will find it with a note on it saying: "Thank you for coming into my life."


D. If your partner is starting a new job, buy a copy of "The Sound Of Music" sound track. Tape the song, "I Have Confidence" onto a tape and add your own message at the end of the song saying,
"Good Luck honey, I have confidence in you." Give the tape to your partner to play on the way to work in the car.


E. Buy a small decorated cardboard box, a sheet of colored tissue paper, some massage oil and a blank card. Line the box with the tissue paper.

Place the massage oil in the box and write the following message on the card:

I know a great Masseur.
For an appointment ring:
(Your Phone Number)



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND HAPPY BY BEING POETIC

Memorize one of Shakespeare's love sonnets and recite it to your partner when you are in a romantic setting like a botanical garden. Don't just suddenly start reciting poetry as this will just sound corny.

While you are cuddling your partner, ask in a joking manner, "So is now a good time to recite a love poem to you?" She will probably say yes, expecting you to come up with something of the "Roses are Red..." variety.

Instead, look into her eyes, smile and recite the sonnet while you gently stroke her face. Try the sonnet below. If this is too long, just memorize the first four lines and the last two.

Shakespeare Love Sonnet 18


Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimmed,
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimmed.
But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest,
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st.
So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

TOP 10 IDEAS TO WOO YOUR GIRLFRIEND

IDEA # 1
If your partner is going away for a few days, tell her that you are worried about her so you have organized a bodyguard to look after her. Then give her a small teddy bear.

IDEA # 2
Buy a packet of glow in the dark stars and stick the stars on the roof above your bed to spell out a message such as "I Love You" When the lights go down, your message will be revealed!

IDEA # 3
On a special occasion, buy your partner eleven real red roses and one artificial red rose. Place the artificial rose in the center of the bouquet. Attach a card that says: “I will love you until the last rose fades.”

IDEA # 4
Buy the domain name of your partner's name if it is available for example www.TanyaJohnston.com. Create a web page containing a romantic poem and a picture of a rose. When your partner is surfing the web, casually ask whether she has ever checked to see whether her domain name is taken. Let
her type it in to discover her page.


IDEA # 5
Buy a stylish hand mirror and give it to your partner as a gift. Include a card in the box saying
“In this mirror you will see the image of the most beautiful woman in the world.”

IDEA # 6
Take a book that your partner is reading and using a pencil, underline letters in a section of the book she has yet to read to spell out a love letter. For example in the following exert from a novel, the underlined letters come together to spell out the secret message "I love you" The palace was a labyrinth, their passage through it tortuous and interminable. Initially they passed from building to building under the sodden sky. Steve's feet ached; he might have laughed at himself, the tireless
traveler, grown too soft from his months in the city to walk any proper distance. Abruptly the guards halted. The underlined letters will make your partner curious and with a bit of luck she will write them down. Spend time to encode a proper message such as "Dear Belinda, I love you honey"

IDEA # 7
Have flowers delivered to your partner's workplace. She will not only enjoy the flowers but will also receive comments and attention from her office mates which will add to her enjoyment.

IDEA # 8
While walking with your partner on a weekend getaway, pick up a smoothstone and say that you're going to keep it as a special memento of your trip.  Later, have a message such as "I Love Rebecca"
engraved into the stone by a jeweler and give it to your partner.

IDEA # 9
Drive into the country, find a grassy hill and lie with your partner and look up at the clouds.
Play the kid’s game of looking for shapes in the cloud formations.

IDEA # 10
Get a piece of paper and some crayons. Draw a bright childlike picture with a smiley sun and two stick figures holding hands. Add labels with your two names pointing to the stick figures. Write "I Love You" inside a heart.

Next get a large formal envelope. Place your drawing inside and type up a
formal address label of your partner's work such as:

For the immediate and urgent attention of:
Charlaise Collins
Level 16
Bella & Eduard Solicitors
New York

Mail it to your partner so she receives it in the middle of a busy day.



If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at authorsviewpoint@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! ;) 
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DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.lovelifediaries.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

BEST PET NAME FOR YOUR GIRLFRIEND

Are you looking for a pet name that will make your girlfriend giggles with so much joy?


There are the best pet name for your girlfriend.


1. Honey Bunny
2. Lovey
3. Wifie
4. Mallows
5. Sexylicious
6. Gorgeous
7. Beautiful
8. Princess
9. My Queen
10. Sweetie pie
11. Cutie Patootie
12. Poochi Moochi

If you want to submit articles, poems, love stories, love letters, write ups you like to share to us and to the world. Kindly email us at help.bookofdistraction@gmail.com We will email you back once it is up on our site with credits and feature you as the author of the month. Continue supporting www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com Thank You my Loves! xoxo ;) 
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 DISCLAIMER:Some of the photos, links, articles are not owned by the site, and/ or not being stored by the site.Comments are views expressed by the readers. www.bookofbeautifuldistraction.blogspot.com may not be held liable for the views of readers exercising their right of freedom to express.If you think we should remove those aforementioned elements due to copyright infrequent, feel free to tell us, and we will comply.

My Beautiful Distraction